Presented by BetterHelp
Being in a long-term relationship can promote feelings of safety and security, helping you feel less lonely and more fulfilled. However, long-term relationships such as marriage can also be challenging, as you and your spouse must learn how to stay close and connected as the years go on. Without intimacy, the marriage can become dull, and the spark that was once there may slowly cease to exist. The good news is that it is possible to fix intimacy concerns in your marriage, provided you have the right tools and effort from both parties. Keep reading to learn more about growing closer when you feel far from your spouse.
Tips For Improving Intimacy In Marriage
Intimacy extends to both physical and emotional needs, as each can be vital to a healthy marriage. If you’re wondering how to fix intimacy issues, the following tips may be helpful:
- Have regular date nights: Intentionality can make a world of difference in a relationship, and especially in a marriage. Planning date nights once or twice a week can help you and your spouse stay intimately connected by giving you time to talk and enjoy one another’s company. Whether you’re cuddling at the movies, laughing over dinner, or being competitive at mini golf, making memories together can help remind each of you why you love the other.
- Use physical touch: Physical touch is more than just sex; it also includes holding hands, kissing, hugging, cuddling, putting arms around each other, and so on. Showing your spouse affection through physical touch can trigger the release of oxytocin, a chemical that promotes bonding and happiness. Touch also cultivates trust and communicates love without even saying a word.
- Perform check-ins: Marriage check-ins are small, timed meetings that allow you and your partner to discuss what you’re enjoying about your relationship and what could use some improvement. You may schedule these once a week, once a month, or every few months. Instead of avoiding important discussions, you can ensure that problems are out in the open.
- Schedule sex: Over time, it can be more difficult to find time for sex, as schedules grow busier and responsibilities like caring for children are added. Putting sex on the schedule can help ensure that it happens on a consistent basis instead of neglecting that part of your and your spouse’s lives.
- Learn each other’s love languages: The five love languages refer to a set of ways in which people give and receive love. They include words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, physical touch, and receiving gifts. You and your partner can take the quiz online to figure out which of the love languages you primarily use. You might find that you and your partner show love in the same way, or you may discover that each of you is very different in terms of your expression. Understanding your partner’s love language can help ensure that you’re giving them love in a way that they can receive.
Other strategies can also prove useful when seeking to become closer as marital partners. However, if you and your spouse have tried seemingly everything and are still struggling to make your marriage more intimate, attending couples therapy could be beneficial.
Conclusion
Intimacy issues can be challenging to experience, as no one wants to feel far from their spouse. However, all marriages go through bumps every now and then, and it’s important to try to avoid becoming discouraged before solutions can be discovered. While your situation may seem hopeless now, many married couples find that when they both have the same goals in mind and are willing to put in the work to reach them, they can accomplish more than they ever thought possible.
