My fundamentals, or “essentials” as some call them, are important to me. I like them to hang down to my toes and feel proud of my pair and the way they hang. I like to feel tapered, well-hung, and well-cut. And not too pared-back. And not “How does my butt and genital definition look in these?”
My Lumsdens, as I also like to call them, are close to my heart. I demand a lot from my chinos (as most people know them). I don’t want to look too colonial, too collegiate, too New York, too L.A., or too fashion-forward. Nor too high street, too minimalist and COS, too Ripley, too America’s Cup and Henley Royal Regatta.
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And above all, too all sad Dad (no style, all elasticated, forgiving waistband) or so obviously clearance sale. Sturdy, flattering, smart, good-with blousons-cardies-windbreakers-hoodies, dress-coded business events, and social gatherings where you are expected to have tried but not too conspicuously. But still be seasonally apt and stylishly co-ordinated.
British Army officer, Sir Harry Lumsden, is credited with creating khaki in 1848. Stationed in India, Lumsden wanted to camouflage his white uniform. So he concocted a dye made from curry powder, coffee, and mulberries. Khaki is the Hindu word for dust. Harry’s direct design descendants therefore include Daniel Lee at Burberry, Tom Ford, Boss, Reiss, Sunspel, Wax London, Thom Browne Unconstructed, Nike’s, Ralph Lauren’s double-pleated Whitmans, and Sweden’s A Day’s March.
Basically, Chinos are American khaki. At the end of the nineteenth century in the Philippines, American Armed Forces fighting in the Spanish-American War wore khaki sourced from hard-wearing Chinese twill cotton. Local Spanish speakers called them “Chinos”. After the war, army surplus chinos flooded the market and became popular with students. Especially on the East Coast.
What would Sir Harry have made of brands changing the name of his khaki to shades of shitake, clay, capers, fog, and timer wolf?
And the tsunami of flat and pleated fronts, made in Portugal Drake’s, Gaps, J.Crew 484s, Charles Tyrwhitt non-irons, Mangos, Dickies, high-waist shrunken-style Son of Mutes, rugby clubhouse Raging Bulls, Tuff Tonys, Thomas Pink Voltaires, SNNO7s, Incotex, Nikes, Percival, L’Estranges, Fatfaces and narrow thigh Spoke Heroes.
And huge waves of relaxed fits and slim legs, vintage laundered, Loewe mid-waist flares, Stone islands, patterned jacquards, Zegnas, Gallery Dept, Kotns gabardine twill cuffed, Carhartt WIP Masters, Italian stretch Bonobos, lustrous sateen, button welt pockets, Prada five pockets, bootcut and Superdry core slims.
And a new generation of vain men obsessed with rotating their legwear.
Men and their trousers. It’s such an XL Subject….
There is such a massive choice of chinos so a massive amount of chances to make a massive mistake.
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Some make you look like an Oxbridge swot, nerdy Ivy Leaguer, or someone who is something in IT. The conservative choices. Some make a man come over as trying far too hard to be out of a suit.
If you don’t choose correctly, if you aren’t trousered properly, it’s easy for people –men and women- to say “ Here is a man desperately trying to elongate his form with a straight-leg silhouette and ankle-length cut.”
Or: “There is a person in his too obviously go-to-polo deliberately gone high rise to show off his shapely ankles and Alpha Male socks.”
You have to be careful about Chinos. Especially the colors. But whether it’s called sage, olive, dark forest, wild ginger, tawny, warm taube, English mustard, mellow Cotswolds stone, or plain sand, it’s basically khaki which is basically combat which is basically military. So people will either think: what is this man fighting against and why? Or that you are on the way to a regimental dinner.
Choosing the right pair of chinos is a battlefield. It is a dangerous country. A man must be brave or cowardly. It is the survival of the best fit.
Now. we see guidance from LuluLemon about about four-way-stretch Warpstreme fabric and ABC™ (anti-ball-crushing) technology. Different shapes require different chino gurus
Former England rugby international and World Cup winner Phil Vickey founded “Raging Bull”. “Lots of men find chinos a nightmare to fit especially blokes like me with, shall we say, generous thighs. My brand has been designed to fit everyone up to 6XL. Having been squeezed into some really badly fitting chinos in my past as a rugby player I was keen that Raging Bull would get the fit right.
“Our chinos are designed to be a bit more roomy on the thigh but taper down to a slim but not skinny ankle. It’s a nice balanced shape and seems to work for nearly everyone. The waist sits mid-rise and is ultra-comfortable meaning no problems if you are now facing long days back in the office.”
Nick Alderton, aka Lord Trousers, heads Peter Christian and he knows a thing or two about chinos. “I’ve been wearing chinos since they began to land in UK military surplus stores in the 60s. Then, they had a shabbily glamorous whiff of the Beat Generation, the hint of a rebel without a cause. Over the decades they sharpened up, the pleated military baggy giving way to a slimmer line favored by modernist and Ivy League fans. In recent years, they have become our universally popular default cotton trousers of choice, which are suitable for work or play.
“We find our customers wear them just about all year round these days. We carry a rainbow of colors over a panoply of styles, heavier weight for summer, light, tropical drill for the warmer months. We offer a pleated front for the gent who likes a bit more trouser room, or a flat front for a slimmer silhouette.
“Sockless with a pair of deck shoes or navy blue or stone with shiny penny loafers or suede desert boots, whichever way you wear them Chinos are the strides for all seasons! But, when considering which to buy, it must be remembered at all times that they are just as important as a suit. One must always put on a good front.”
Color comes before fit. Only a few can carry off Etro plaid or an Etro floral print. Some men can’t be camels. Some feel rusty and aging. A tan can be risky. Charcoal and asphalt gray too. Oregano is always a safe call and khaki, in whatever manifestation. won’t let you down. But ivory and cream require a brave heart and a steady hand.
Taking your time over a pair of new chinos will reward you. So think: “Payback”
As well as “Splashback.”
